You know I like to mind my own business, right? I can see you frowning. Okay, I know, not every time because I cannot resist the temptation of blogging about it. Well, yesterday, I was really minding my own business when I saw Praise Fowowe on this popular TVC Television Show called Your View and they were discussing a very hot topic, as usual.
"LIVE-IN LOVERS? WHAT ABOUT THAT?" - very hot!!!
To be honest with you, I was already enjoying the show when Uwa, one of the Co-hosts, said something that strikes at the very base of what I stand to believe about love, sex and marriage.
She said... "Life happens and not everyone will willingly live the comfort of their home to live with a lover we should treat the root cause." And she actually said it repeatedly, even tweet about it.
That contradicts everything I was called to teach the younger generation! That LIVE statement can make any young girl to pack her things and start living with a man she's not married to. And if you ask her why, she will say "Life happens!!!"
I may not have a TV Show to make sure I correct that wrong notion, but I'm sure going to preach the gospel of Sex, Love and Marriage to the utmost part of the world!!!
So, for the sake of some young girls who watched the program and heard her say those words repeatedly, Uwa is wrong on this one!
There's absolutely no excuse or any reason whatsoever to live with a man you're not married to. NO EXCUSE!! In fact, I'm yet to find any reasonable reason for a decent girl to live her father's house to co-habit with a man she's not married to. If you have any reason, please let me know! As far as I'm concern, there's none!
Praise Fowowe asked one question that went unanswered...
: Why would you want to live with a man you're not married to in the first place?!
That's a very good question, but unfortunately they ignored it. Even if it's because you're homeless or your parent maltreats you as a girl, it's not enough reason to seek a man's house as your final option. How long do you plan to live under the same roof with him? Until he's ready to marry you? Are you a Learner?
If he so much love you as he made you to believe, how much are they paying for court wedding? Last time I checked in Ikoyi Registry, with just N15,000, you can have a decent Court Wedding. If he so much want to rescue you from whatever that made you run to him as your last hope, he should be able to afford N15,000 to do the needful. So the reason why he will not do the needful is not because he doesn't have money. It's simply because he still think you're not good enough to be a wife to him because there's absolutely no difference in you moving in with him and him marrying you. So, why can't he just go ahead and marry you?
No man in his shoe can answer that because they know what they are doing! You're obviously the one who doesn't know the first thing about Love, Sex and Marriage!!!
He won't because he prefer to take advantage of the moment. No, ignore that! He won't because he prefer to take advantage of YOU!!!
Hear me, a guy that ask or allow you to move in with him knows what he's doing. He sees 'awuf' and he took advantage of it. Period!!! He doesn't have to tell you that. He will never create that impression for you, but that's what he's getting - "Awuf Bonus!" That's what you are.
Uwa also said don't judge anyone living with a man.
Well, I say you can't blame anyone that judge such a girl because there's absolutely no excuse for girl, of any background, to move in with a man she's not married to. Under normal circumstances, you have no excuse to move in with him and expect people not to judge you. People will judge you. Your family will judge you. Society will judge you and guess what God will judge you as well!!!
Sorry, before I forget, I'll personally judge you as well though it is written "judge not."
Listen to me, daughter of God, no one is judging you. Not at all. They are only frowning at what is wrong, that's all.
She also said that it's the identity of who you are that matters. What? That's not an excuse!!! You may know yourself, you may work on yourself, you may trust yourself for all I care, but the question is... can you trust that guy? Can the guy trust himself around you? Can he live under the same roof with you for 5 years without fighting the thought of sleeping with you? No, ma! So, sorry girl, it's not about it. It's about him!!!
Even in simple case of not moving in with him, he still feel like sleeping with you and if you refuse he will threaten to break up with. So for those of you, living with a man you're not married to and you think he truly loves you, try and refuse him sex and see if he will not throw you out. If he did not, then try and keep it up until he put a ring on your finger and see if I'm right or wrong.
A man that allow you to move in with her will not marry you. I don't care if the girl next door eventually got married to the guy she had been living with for years because you don't know what she did to make him marry her. You don't know how many abortion she has done! You don't know where she went to conjure powers to make him marry her. You don't know, you may never know and you may not be able to do whatever she did even if you know!
I have so much to say to you, but I'm still very much around so I'm going to leave you with this word: Think Who Stand To Lose More If It Doesn't Work Out!!!
Never, ever, give your pride price when you've not collected your bride price!!!
#GuidYourWays
Continue to see tweets from fans who doesn't agree with her.
18 comments:
I agree wth you Tessy. She's very wrong to say all that. What will she do if her daughter leave home to live with a man. Abi she doesn't know that it's not when there's crises at home that girls move in with guys. Some do it from school. They will leave school during vacation and camp in the guys house for weeks and they will tell their parents they are in school. To them, they are drunken in love.
Tessy, u too dey talk too much. It's called getting to know yourself very well. So free the lady
How will I know what and who am marrying? I need to test proof her to know if she's what I want before I seal the deal.
Right on Point, Tessy. Uwa should take a backseat
I watched the program myself, though the repeat broadcast and I was surprise that there can a mother who will argue that fact irresepctive of what she thought about judging or family crises.
I quite agree with you, Tessy, but to be candid it's not an easy job those women are doing up there. It's not easy to be on a national show and not get carried away.I'm sure she will be regretting what she said right now. If you watch one of their shows in April where one of their co-hosts got angry because a caller offended her and she just walked away.
Pls spare her
Thanks for correcting that notion jare. You really need to share this thing on social media because lik you said some girls will begin to carry that in their head
their tweet is trending seriously on twitter. But it's all wrong to tell any girl that she can live with a man she's not married to.
One word for Uwa... she's defending herself. If you look carefully at her, she has done something like that in the past and she's giving an excuse for it now.
That's what I always say about all these TV personality. They need to understand that being on that station is very powerful and what she's saying as if she's right can influence any girl out there.
The harm is done already. A girl watching the broadcast from a man's house will have more reason to remain there.
There's no how you'll live with a guy for a year or two and not commit abortion at least once except if u dont mind getting married with pregnancy
kk. Tessy, u r rite. uwa is wrong. are u satisfy now
What if the girl's parents are not in the country and she's stranded here. And the guy has a good accomodation, but doesnt have money to rent another apartment for her.
@Yinkkaolamide, are telling us now that the guy doesn't have a family in the country as well? Even if he doesn't are yu saying he doesn't have a female friends he can ask her to stay for a while?
My dear, Tessy has said it all. No Excuses!
Is it not better to judge than to watch them sell themselves cheap. If judging them wil change them or open their eyes to their wrongs then we better judge them very well
Hyprocrite. There are some that sleeps with their boyfriend before marriage and they will come here to tell us rubbish. Whats the difference
@Udoh Okocha
I think if we consider Exodus 23:2 where the Lord God said "Thou shalt not follow a multitude to do evil; neither shalt thou speak in a cause to decline after many to wrest judgment"; you will see that many of us so-called christians of today would be in for some serious shockers the jugdment seat on the last day if God does not show us mercy.
This lady is openly advocating licentiousness and concupicence as the Bible terms it. How can you be claiming to be a good Nigerian role-model, not even a good christian lady and be openly selling co-habitation as an option for Nigerian unmarried singles. I don't care how many people are watching her. For saying that, she's so wrong and on that point a socio-cultural failure!
At this stage of Nigeria's evolution, we need focussed youths and Godly, creative singles like Tessy to birth a new change not force-feed our youths some nonsense American tripe that the rest of the world is regurgitating.
Most of our VJ's/presenters are un-original, copycat-wannabe's who can only present after watching and mimicking misguided American OAPs with failed personal lives anyway, blame them!
@Tessy, Goodjob girl, God bless u more and more!
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